A week ago my grandfather passed away after being sick for a long time. It was a very hard and exhausting week, full of emotions.
Besides all the pain, exhaustion, negative thoughts and confusion, I actually found a part inside me that saw something positive in this situation. I finally realised something that I had never realised before.
When my grandfather passed away the first thing that went through my mind was that I would never have the chance to hear his voice, see his smile and feel his warmth ever again. These thoughts that were constantly popping up in my mind where killing me. Nights after nights I was crying in my bed, wishing that I could just hold him one more time. But then there was this little voice inside of me trying to give me a small pick-me-up. I realised that all the time that I was with him, I just wasn’t aware of how special that moment was. At that time being at his house and having a conversation was seen as ‘normal‘, now I see that moment as such and special thing. I would do everything to experience that moment once again.
Even though this was one of the most hurtful weeks in my life, there was something positive. This week I learned to be much more aware, grateful and to enjoy EVERY moment. I want to enjoy every conversation, the wind blowing through my hair, the rain pouring on my face and the smell of the flowers. You never know what will happen, you never know when it will be the last time you will experience even the most ‘normal‘ things.